by Teryl Cartwright, instructor of the Timothy Circle mentor training

We know you want the best for your child and it can be hard to allow another adult to have an influential role.  As you seek to protect and encourage your children, it is vital to have open communications. While you may not be told all of what your child discusses with their mentor, there are expectations and safe practices for your mentor and child to have accountability.

  • If your church/youth leaders choose the mentor, you should know who the person is and why they were chosen.
  • Your minor child’s mentor should have training in Safe Sanctuaries and clean background checks, commit to meeting in public or open spaces, or have online policies that you can review.
  • Your child’s mentor should work with your child to have a mutually agreed upon goals and meeting times which may be an informal contract.
  • Your child’s mentor should be willing to meet you initially but should focus on your child going forward.
  • Your child’s mentor should not suddenly have separate meetings with you so both of you can preserve the trust of your child.
  • Your child and/or their mentor should not lie or become secretive. Any changes in behavior can be discussed.


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